4.04.2007

:(

My emotions toward my shop and extending to life in general change almost hourly. I'm really low right now. I haven't been here in months...and that had been good. But a conglomeration of events, most of them small, broke me. I'm just tired. It feels like I have to fight a million people to get one view on anything. Much less a hearter and sales? I'm about to go another month with nothing. I can't take this much longer. I'm going to try to list everyday this month. Why not keep building up my debt to the world? That'll be $6 at the least. I'm in the showcase this month on my birthday. My birthday. I'll be 21 and I couldn't scareder or angrier. Meh!

I'm tired of fighting, of trying to make this work. Not just Etsy, everything. No one around me understands. I don't know who can help me. I'm alone...but I've been alone for a long time. Creating is something I love and I'll probably always do it. But it looks like it's the corporate world or bust. I hate the corporate world...working in it. It ties my stomach in knots...just thinkin' about it.

Well, this wasn't encouraging. It wasn't that carthatic for me either. I better stop before I start crying again.