Push. Fight. Win?

I attempted a sewing project yesterday. It didn't work out the way I had hoped. I'm no stranger to this, somewhat botched attempt at 'brilliance'. No artists/designers, or very few, are. But it just feels like nothing is working for me now. It's me against the world. I've felt like this for a while. I'm tired of it. Addendum: The very smallest something has me smiling. Amazing!

I'm still going through our pictures. I'd gotten sidetracked like I know would. But I'm back because I need to do something with my days. Found this one, of my and the brothers at a wedding, circa 1999. I'm in the center, in case you can't tell:



Post Picture (top): My feet. I had on mismatching socks yesterday. I noticed too late for it to be the post picture for yesterday. I can dress myself...really.

Ellipses

It's oddly warm here, where I live, across the street from a white house. (It's probably just as warm on the other side of the street. :P) It's dreadfully overcast, though. I really wanted to go for a walk, I needed to be outside. So I did. For about 45 minutes I strolled along with my umbrella in one hand, just in case, my bag slung over my shoulder.

I got a line that may be on a t-shirt or something one day. I tried not to think about my...situation, the thing that is still on my mind all the time. It annoys and captivates me, still. It's frustrating and I just...wish...I could...get some closure I guess. This open-ended limbo thing just isn't cool. Really, truly.

Instead I listened to water rushing at the pond, the squish of my boot-ish shoes on the supersoaked ground. I dodged puddles and...other pleasantries left on the sidewalk. *reports* heh. I listened to the song that's been cycling through my brain: One Republic's Stop and Stare, mainly the chorus. I wondered if I looked ridiculous with my brightly colored golf umbrella, it was closed, on a dry day. It was mildly refreshing. But then, I was home, and...well...

So I continue and wait and trust that one day, this won't be the topic of everything I write, touch, talk about. One day...

Post Picture: Taken in May 2007 on the day I fell in love with photography. Seeing it now, reminds me of brighter days in every sense of the term. To spring!

Continue 2.17

I feel I may reuse that title as I've reused others. I like short titles for posts, quickly summing up what the post is generally about. So as you may guess, I'm continuing.

'Tis a slow, rainy Sunday. I was gonna go for a walk, but cold AND rainy just isn't fun.

Yesterday I used courage I didn't know I had. I think it was courage. It was definitely a challenge. I wasn't glad at first, I can't say I'm glad now, but I am at peace. Which is good, and a change. I had been so conflicted. The change continues


I do hope to get some work done for a new item in my shop. However, I'm not sure I have all the stuff that I need for it. I'm not sure if I'm want to use these snap hooks or something like them. I don't think I NEED them. But, you know, conflict.

Post picture: Me holding a giant potato in front of one of the dining room windows. I can't figure a way to tie this into the post. It was just a zany pic for the Photopalooza. Love me!

Now 2.16

I joined the Etsy Photopalooza! today. To include pictures in my posts I am to do. So there!

You know it's not good when your mom says she's proud of you and the first thing you think is, when your head on your hand, "No, this horrible." Emotional rollercoasters suck.

Generally I try to post pictures of things that relate somehow to the post. I guess I'll say, and I'm reaching here, that I'm a mess like those loops, but hoping that out of all this there will be something good that lasts forever, or a long time. (Those old-school woven potholders are tough.)

Post Picture: From May of 2007- potholder loops, some on the loom, in the shadows. One of the pics my camera agreed to. It's such a cantankerous little thing.

Sorry

I have become popular enough to get spam comments. Meh! If it was a one-time thing, I'd be okay. But it's not, so I'm adding CAPTCHA to the commenting now. I hate the things. But it must be done. Hopefully that'll help.